Do you want me to ignore your email?

Kitten in a Frog CostumePut the word “Meeting” in the Subject line. Or, even better, why don’t you clarify? Instead of “Meeting,” try a more precise word or phrase: “boring,”  “waste of time,” or “mind-numbing recitation of stale information.”

Also, if I see “Fwd:” in the Subject line, I delete the email immediately—without opening it. A child in North Dakota may die of a rare form of cancer because I didn’t send it to 157 of my friends, but guess what? I’ll never know about it.

Or how about “(no subject).” The sender was too lazy to even pay the respect of summarizing the contents.

Or “Statement” as in “Credit Card Statement” or “Your Online Banking Statement is ready to be viewed.” No, I think I’ll go lock myself in the closet and cry instead. Does the IRS accept indentured servitude?

Or, “Oops!” You know that the last email you received from that person didn’t include the information that justified the email in the first place. Remind me not to let my kids play at your house.

If the email’s subject line or body contains the phrase “cuddly critters” or pictures of fluffy kittens in frog costumes, then I don’t think we can be friends anymore.

Have I forgotten anything? Can you think of words in subject lines that make you cringe?

Comments Closed

9 Comments

  1. Posted March 4, 2011 at 11:57 pm | Permalink

    vi4gra

  2. Posted March 5, 2011 at 3:28 pm | Permalink

    Or any variation of “Do you want to grow your Anaconda?”

  3. Posted March 7, 2011 at 12:02 am | Permalink

    Next time I email you, I’m going to look back at this post to decide what to use in my subject line.

    Just sayin.

  4. Lauren
    Posted March 7, 2011 at 12:10 am | Permalink

    Pretty much anything with the word America in it…

  5. Posted March 7, 2011 at 2:13 pm | Permalink

    Yes. Yes. Yes. As in “Act now – 10 major threats to freedom in America.”

  6. Posted March 7, 2011 at 2:13 pm | Permalink

    I can’t guarantee that you’ll get a response. : )

  7. Posted March 7, 2011 at 2:14 pm | Permalink

    Isn’t it amazing that though the the word has no “a,” we can still read it?!!

    Who are these people? I wonder if spammers kick kittens.

    Probably.

  8. Posted March 7, 2011 at 4:01 pm | Permalink

    I particularly dislike “hello” as a subject. It might as well read “(no subject)”.

  9. Posted March 8, 2011 at 11:41 am | Permalink

    Excellent observation. “Hello” is such a bland subject that I immediately think the sender is a spammer.