Guys and girls are different

A guest post by Travis Bullington

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Guys and girls are different. Did I just blow your mind with this original insight?

But seriously, guys and girls are different.  If we were the same, I would have them figured out by now, and some of my last relationships might have ended differently.

Let me give you an example of one of the differences. I usually know what day of the week it is. Today is Friday. That means I’ll have some time to myself tomorrow. Maybe I’ll take my Australian shepherd Cody to the dog park or clean up around the house. But I couldn’t tell you off the top of my head if tomorrow is a major holiday or a friend’s birthday. This lack of knowledge about the significance of a day can get a guy into trouble. Girls also know what day it is, but they use a different system.

I met a girl in college who we’ll call Leah. From what I could tell in the class we had together, Leah was attractive, fun, and had a good sense of humor. One particular evening, I had nothing to do, so I decided to give Leah a call and see if she wanted to grab some food with me.  That’s the wording I used too:

“Do you want to go get some food with me?”

Not the most charming or romantic invitation, I admit, but what I had in mind was a casual hangout with a cool girl who I didn’t know too terribly well. But I knew her well enough to be interested in getting to know her better. You know what I mean. I didn’t have a marriage proposal in my pocket, but she wasn’t some random girl at a bar or coffee shop.

She agreed to dinner and asked what time I was going to pick her up. Her house was on my way so I didn’t think much of this carpooling. We chose a time, and I went back to goofing off with my buddies at the dorm. A few hours later, I pulled into her driveway. I don’t remember exactly what I was wearing, but it’s safe to say I was dressed in jeans, flip flops, and maybe a button up shirt and a fleece jacket.

She was wearing high heels.

She looked great. She also looked way overdressed for both myself and for the other people eating at Gus’s Good Times Deli.

Now, I will put the quality of Gus’s sandwiches up against the food at the fanciest restaurant. The atmosphere, not so much: old linoleum flooring, the same hard booths that have been there for twenty years, and Gus in his stained Polo without the buttons. Though I could make the argument that the atmosphere has its own grungy kind of charm, that charm adds exactly zero to the romantic experience.

Then again, a romantic experience wasn’t what I had in mind when I invited Leah.

We had a good time. The conversation never lagged. She laughed at my jokes or at least pretended to laugh. The only awkwardness came when Gus asked why a pretty girl like her had gone out with a slob like me. He also mentioned that he was honored I had brought her there. Thanks, pal.

The evening ended, and I took Leah home. It wasn’t until the next day when I was talking to another female friend of mine that I heard about how excited Leah had been about our date. I didn’t know we had gone out on a date.  I didn’t know that I’d asked Leah to get food on Valentine’s Day. I had no clue. It had been just another Tuesday to me.

I have since learned my lesson. I now check to make sure that Hallmark hasn’t charged a particular day with significance before I make plans with a girl. Yes, I still have to make plans with girls. You can guess how things turned out with Leah and me.

She married a guy who shares her grasp on the Hallmark schedule.

Comments Closed

6 Comments

  1. Posted February 11, 2011 at 9:20 pm | Permalink

    When Hallmark comes out with International Marriage Proposal Day(s), you’ll really be in trouble. The dates will probably be significant and memorable, like April 12, July 17 and November 3.

  2. Posted February 11, 2011 at 11:44 pm | Permalink

    Are those the birthdays of members of your family? At least getting married narrows down the number of possible significant dates, and your friends can say, “What are you and Noah doing for Valentine’s Day?” Oh yeah…

  3. Lauren
    Posted February 13, 2011 at 12:08 am | Permalink

    Don’t feel bad. I suggested earlier today that we have the kids we mentor over on Monday. I didn’t realize until I looked at the calendar that it was Valentines…we may still have them over anyway.

  4. Posted February 14, 2011 at 10:25 am | Permalink

    I got a couple of texts from one of our Nashville friends saying that Travis’s posts had saved him from inadvertently asking a girl out on a second date for Valentine’s Day. Though I’m glad he won’t have to navigate that potentially awkward situation, I regret that I won’t get to hear the story.

  5. Posted February 14, 2011 at 10:17 pm | Permalink

    No, those dates were pulled totally at random. Although our wedding anniversary is 2 days before my birthday, so that’s helpful.

  6. Posted February 15, 2011 at 3:30 pm | Permalink

    Grouping significant dates is a good tactic. I never forget my younger sister’s birthday because it’s just three days after mine. Anyone else in the family is hit or miss.